I had written this yesterday but didn’t get time to finish and post it.
As I was opening my journal this morning the entry of November 1, 2010 caught my eye. “We were looking at houses in Nova Scotia again last night. I think that we have come to the point of really considering..” Exactly a year ago. We had been tossing around the idea for several months already but it was a big step for us. Not so much the move or Nova Scotia itself, but having come to the place of such a drastic plan change. A change that decided that we would remain in Canada rather than move to Serbia or Montenegro and it was a difficult place to come to. To let go of the plan/desire to go to the people that we had planned to live and work among was hard for us. And yet, after a year of wrestling we knew it was time. Once we had made the decision, our move to Nova Scotia became such an exciting dream and now we are here.
I don’t think that it was possible to have any idea just what challenges this move would bring, I think that we thought it would be ‘easier’ than our previous plans. At this point when we have been here for five months we have discovered many things to love and this place fits us in many of our perspectives and dreams while rubbing in other ones. It hasn’t come without its share of bumps and bruises even in only five months though. Have you ever been in space or place in life that you just know? That is how I feel. Even when I feel terribly lonely and far from people that I love. Even as I struggle to choose thankfulness as our renovations stall and the wait to move into our house continues. Even as the savings cushion is depleted and our expenses are hard to match with what is earned. Even as I try to see where I fit in this new place and community. Even when I am torn with the desire to share life with others but feel so overwhelmed. Even when I remember our happy, snug little life in Alberta with the rosy glow of time passed. Even as the plans for a barn, chickens, and a cow seem unattainable. And the list could go on. The point is that while I can’t say that I find the day to day easy and where the romantic sheen has worn thin, I still have this faith, this knowing in my bones that here, right now, this little community is the place for us.