I’ve only made it to day two and already I spent the past
hour struggling for words and so tempted to just go to bed. I had wanted to
start by giving you a little glimpse of my soul but that is more difficult than
you might expect. Today Aneliese asked what a soul was after hearing the word
in a story. How does one explain to a four year old that it is the deepest
place within? Even more, how does one pull aside the curtain for a brief
glimpse of that place?
I had thought that I could easily give the spiritual
connection of Becoming Kindred. After all, it’s important because it is what
lends color and life to the next 29 days. Indeed it is the structure of this
blog though much like the frame and foundation of a house, it’s not the first
thing seen to the eye. Also like a house, the beauty, character and decoration
would be absent if not for the structure.
I’ve now lived almost half of my years in gratefulness to
the gift of the Savior and in the life of Spirit. It’s hard to explain that
with out turning to the common phrases that are so easily spoken but less
understood. In this past while, I have entered a season of more questions than
answers, of more silence than communion, and I have felt so distant from God.
And yet somehow there has continued a connection that has told me God is not
absent, I’ve not been left.
To be kindred is to be alike, to be similar, and to be in
relationship with. I chose the name Becoming Kindred because that is what I
seek; to continue to become alike in relationship to the Life Giver. As that works out in my life, it will show here as it has in the past.
I once had a friend tell me in the course of a conversation
that I knew what she thought about “religious things” but as I thought about it
later, I realized that I didn’t. I didn’t know because in my hesistancy to push
my beliefs on her, I had never listened to hers. She, out of respect of what
she thought I believed, wouldn’t have freely offered her thoughts.
Conversations that we could have had to bring us into a better place of
understanding were avoided because we didn’t want to offend.
I know that some who read my blog are walking a similar path while others I know are not. In my home, I would not attempt to force my faith on any; I am not ashamed but mindful that my life is not to be pushed on another. The nice thing about this space is that you always have the ability to leave without hurt to anyone. There doesn’t need to be a feeling of forced conversation, if you wish to read and take part, I gladly welcome you. Here, I am the instigator of the conversation but most likely I will be enriched by your input and thoughts. Something that is true must be tested. I don’t see myself as having all the right
answers, far from it in fact, but I do find myself wanting express both my
convictions and my questions. I’d also
like to hear yours.